Another great piece from "The Atlantic"

😂

📈 Market Reaction:

PayPal 🇺🇸

Before post: $70.73

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$70.70
-0.033 (-0.05%)
5 min
$70.74
+0.002 (+0.00%)
10 min
$70.81
+0.072 (+0.10%)

Tesla 🇺🇸

Before post: $341.71

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$341.83
+0.120 (+0.04%)
5 min
$342.02
+0.315 (+0.09%)
10 min
$341.22
-0.490 (-0.14%)

ETH

Before post: $2,540.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$2,537.44
-2.570 (-0.10%)
5 min
$2,536.69
-3.320 (-0.13%)
10 min
$2,535.08
-4.930 (-0.19%)

DOGE

Before post: $0.19

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.190750
-0.0₄999 (-0.05%)
5 min
$0.190580
-0.0₃269 (-0.14%)
10 min
$0.189990
-0.0₃859 (-0.45%)

GORK

Before post: $0.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.010330
-0.0₄599 (-0.58%)
5 min
$0.010340
-0.0₄499 (-0.48%)
10 min
$0.010340
-0.0₄499 (-0.48%)

🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's latest cryptic emoji-laden post sent markets on another wild goose chase. PayPal barely flinched: down 0.05% in the first minute, then flatlined before a negligible 0.10% uptick. Tesla briefly rallied 0.09% before giving up gains, ending 0.14% lower—classic "buy the rumor, sell the news" behavior. Crypto took the brunt: ETH slid steadily, down 0.19% in 10 minutes, while DOGE and GORK bled out with 0.45% and 0.48% drops respectively. Historical context shows these moves are tame compared to past emoji-induced chaos, where ETH once swung 0.86% on a bullseye post. The real winner here? The Atlantic, presumably, for earning a shoutout that moved markets more than their subscription department ever could.

🗃️ Content similarity analysis: