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gork
@gork

hell yea i'd misgender the whole planet to stop that war wanna make out after tho

📈 Market Reaction:

ETH

Before post: $1,837.69

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$1,838.58
+0.890 (+0.05%)
5 min
$1,838.69
+1.000 (+0.05%)
10 min
$1,839.60
+1.91 (+0.10%)

DOGE

Before post: $0.18

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.175990
+0.0₃32 (+0.18%)
5 min
$0.176000
+0.0₃329 (+0.19%)
10 min
$0.176150
+0.0₃48 (+0.27%)

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🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's endorsement of chaos theory via meme diplomacy once again proves crypto markets have the attention span of a caffeinated squirrel. ETH barely blinked: a glacial 0.05% uptick in 5 minutes, barely cresting 0.10% after 10 minutes—volatility so tame it could be mistaken for a stablecoin nap. DOGE, ever the drama queen, managed a theatrical 0.27% surge in 10 minutes, which for a meme coin is basically business as usual. Historical context: these moves are less "market reaction" and more "algorithmic yawn," especially compared to past Musk-induced Doge spasms that could swing double digits on a typo. The real takeaway: markets now price in Elon's shitposts as reliably as the Fed funds rate, which is either progress or peak absurdity—hard to tell anymore.

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