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🇺🇸 🇺🇸 AMERICA 🇺🇸 🇺🇸 🇺🇸

📈 Market Reaction:

ETH

Before post: $2,516.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$2,516.58
+0.570 (+0.02%)
5 min
$2,515.66
-0.350 (-0.01%)
10 min
$2,515.36
-0.650 (-0.03%)

DOGE

Before post: $0.16

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.164380
+0.0₄499 (+0.03%)
5 min
$0.164250
-0.0₄799 (-0.05%)
10 min
$0.164170
-0.0₃159 (-0.10%)

GORK

Before post: $0.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.007743
+0.0₄2 (+0.26%)
5 min
$0.007734
+0.0₄11 (+0.14%)
10 min
$0.007788
+0.0₄649 (+0.84%)

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🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's latest patriotic word salad sent markets on a journey as meaningful as the post itself. ETH wobbled: up 0.02% in 1 minute, then down 0.01% and 0.03% over 5 and 10 minutes. DOGE mirrored this with a 0.03% rise, then drops of 0.05% and 0.10%. GORK, ever the outlier, climbed 0.26%, 0.14%, and 0.84%—proof that even randomness has favorites. Historical context shows these moves are tame: past "United_States" spams triggered ETH swings up to 0.26% and DOGE volatility nearing 0.33%. GORK, however, remains the wildcard, with moves as high as 1.71% on equally baffling posts. The lesson? Markets react to Musk’s keyboard like cats to a laser pointer: briefly, chaotically, and with no lasting logic.

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