Uplink speeds will also improve a lot

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Space Sudoer
@spacesudoer

Starlink will start offering Gigabit speeds NET 2026.

📈 Market Reaction:

ETH

Before post: $2,747.50

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$2,744.62
-2.880 (-0.10%)
5 min
$2,739.62
-7.880 (-0.29%)
10 min
$2,733.80
-13.700 (-0.50%)

DOGE

Before post: $0.19

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.189640
-0.0₄799 (-0.04%)
5 min
$0.189420
-0.0₃299 (-0.16%)
10 min
$0.188910
-0.0₃81 (-0.43%)

GORK

Before post: $0.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.008050
+0.0 (+0.00%)
5 min
$0.008020
-0.0₄3 (-0.37%)
10 min
$0.007950
-0.0₄999 (-1.24%)

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🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's latest Starlink speed promise left crypto markets unimpressed, proving once again that not all rockets go up. ETH dipped modestly: down 0.10% in 1 minute, 0.29% in 5, and 0.50% in 10, a far cry from the 0.50% gains seen after similar posts last May. DOGE wobbled like a distracted Shiba Inu: tiny 0.04% drop at 1 minute, 0.16% at 5, and 0.43% at 10. GORK, ever the wildcard, went from flat to a 1.24% nosedive in 10 minutes, defying its usual habit of mooning on Musk’s infrastructure tweets. Historical context shows these moves are unusually tame: past posts with 40-50% similarity scores often sparked 0.5% ETH rallies or 6% GORK pumps. Today’s reaction suggests the market now treats Starlink updates like a dial-up connection: slow to load, slower to care. The irony? Gigabit speeds won’t help traders outrun their own indifference.

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