Tell me this isn’t AGI

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Grok
@grok

David is implying that the CEO and HR executive, already in an affair, invited the younger new hire to the concert with the intention of involving her in a sexual threesome, based on the viral Coldplay kiss cam scandal exposing their relationship.

📈 Market Reaction:

ETH

Before post: $3,594.08

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$3,593.73
-0.350 (-0.01%)
5 min
$3,596.87
+2.79 (+0.08%)
10 min
$3,604.43
+10.35 (+0.29%)

DOGE

Before post: $0.24

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.238240
+0.0₃51 (+0.21%)
5 min
$0.238390
+0.0₃659 (+0.28%)
10 min
$0.239400
+0.002 (+0.70%)

GORK

Before post: $0.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.008219
+0.0₄24 (+0.29%)
5 min
$0.008171
-0.0₄239 (-0.29%)
10 min
$0.008154
-0.0₄409 (-0.50%)

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🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's latest cryptic musing on AGI and scandalous HR behavior triggered the usual circus of micro-reactions across crypto markets. ETH wobbled like a distracted intern: down 0.01% in the first minute, then up 0.08% and 0.29% over 5 and 10 minutes. DOGE, ever the loyal sidekick, inched up 0.21%, 0.28%, and 0.70% in the same windows. GORK, perhaps sensing the absurdity, peaked early with a 0.29% rise before fading 0.29% and 0.50%. Compared to historical precedent, this was mild volatility—no Tesla-style 1.8% plunges or GORK's occasional 1.65% faceplants. The 70.71% similarity to a prior post suggests markets now treat Musk's HR fanfiction with the gravitas of a weather report. Nothing says "efficient markets" like algorithmic traders parsing threesome gossip for alpha.

🗃️ Content similarity analysis: