📈 Market Reaction:

PayPal 🇺🇸

Before post: $70.54

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$70.60
+0.055 (+0.08%)
5 min
$70.70
+0.158 (+0.22%)
10 min
$70.62
+0.080 (+0.11%)

Tesla 🇺🇸

Before post: $346.98

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$347.32
+0.338 (+0.10%)
5 min
$347.97
+0.995 (+0.29%)
10 min
$348.91
+1.93 (+0.56%)

ETH

Before post: $2,631.05

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$2,632.04
+0.990 (+0.04%)
5 min
$2,640.00
+8.95 (+0.34%)
10 min
$2,650.00
+18.95 (+0.72%)

DOGE

Before post: $0.20

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.196470
+0.0₃24 (+0.12%)
5 min
$0.197010
+0.0₃78 (+0.40%)
10 min
$0.198040
+0.002 (+0.92%)

GORK

Before post: $0.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.010770
+0.0₅999 (+0.09%)
5 min
$0.010850
+0.0₄899 (+0.84%)
10 min
$0.010930
+0.0₃17 (+1.58%)

🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's post of "None" somehow managed to move markets more than most corporate earnings calls. PayPal inched up 0.08% in the first minute, peaking at 0.22% after 5 minutes before settling at 0.11%: a masterclass in mediocrity. Tesla, ever the overachiever, rallied 0.56% over 10 minutes, proving even Musk's silence is worth half a percent. ETH and DOGE followed suit with 0.72% and 0.92% gains respectively, while GORK—because of course—led the pack at 1.58%, because nothing says stability like a meme coin reacting to nothing. Volatility was tame by crypto standards but notable for traditional assets: Tesla's 10-minute swing was twice its average hourly move, and DOGE's 0.92% surge would be a quiet day for Bitcoin but is borderline hysterical for a stock. The markets have spoken: Elon's void is more impactful than most CEOs' full sentences.