📈 Market Reaction:

🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's "jargon None" post triggered the crypto equivalent of a polite golf clap from the market. ETH barely budged: a 0.27% uptick across 1, 5, and 10 minutes, suggesting traders briefly glanced at the post before resuming their coffee breaks. DOGE mirrored this enthusiasm with a 0.28% to 0.44% rise, though the absolute price change was zero—proof that even meme coins can fake enthusiasm. GORK flirted with volatility, dipping 0.07% before a 0.64% rebound, only to flatline at zero change, like a bad improv act. Compared to Musk’s usual market-moving antics, this was less "Tesla rocket" and more "scooter with a flat tire." The lack of historical parallels confirms that even his dullest posts are unique—a feat in itself. The real mystery here is why anyone expected "jargon None" to mean anything at all. Perhaps the market’s Pavlovian response to Musk’s name is the only jargon that matters.