...

📈 Market Reaction:

PayPal 🇺🇸

Before post: $71.82

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$71.80
-0.020 (-0.03%)
5 min
$71.79
-0.030 (-0.04%)
10 min
$71.79
-0.025 (-0.03%)

Tesla 🇺🇸

Before post: $347.89

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$348.05
+0.155 (+0.04%)
5 min
$347.50
-0.390 (-0.11%)
10 min
$347.63
-0.260 (-0.07%)

ETH

Before post: $2,589.66

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$2,591.61
+1.95 (+0.08%)
5 min
$2,593.46
+3.80 (+0.15%)
10 min
$2,600.33
+10.67 (+0.41%)

DOGE

Before post: $0.23

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.228570
+0.0₃179 (+0.08%)
5 min
$0.228780
+0.0₃39 (+0.17%)
10 min
$0.230750
+0.002 (+1.03%)

GORK

Before post: $0.03

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.026710
-0.0₃33 (-1.22%)
5 min
$0.026840
-0.0₃2 (-0.74%)
10 min
$0.026990
-0.0₄5 (-0.18%)

🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's post of "None" somehow managed to move markets more than a politician's empty promise. PayPal dipped slightly: down 0.03% in 1 minute, 0.04% in 5, and 0.03% in 10, as if investors briefly forgot Musk once ran it. Tesla had a fleeting 0.04% gain in 1 minute before sliding 0.11% in 5, settling at 0.07% down in 10, proving even Musk's silence can't save his own stock. ETH climbed steadily: up 0.08%, 0.15%, then 0.41% in 10 minutes, because crypto traders will latch onto anything. DOGE inched up 0.08%, 0.17%, then 1.03% in 10 minutes, because of course it did. GORK, the mystery token, plunged 1.22% in 1 minute before partially recovering, because nothing says volatility like a coin named after a sound. Compared to historical norms, this was less "market-moving" and more "market-shrugging," with reactions so muted they could pass for a sedated sloth. The real irony? Musk's "None" post had more impact than most corporate earnings calls—which says more about markets than him.