I don’t trust Signal anymore

avatar
Beff – e/acc
@BasedBeffJezos

how the f*ck is

@signalapp down rn? x.com/tszzl/status/1…

📈 Market Reaction:

ETH

Before post: $4,035.16

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$4,036.24
+1.08 (+0.03%)
5 min
$4,039.03
+3.87 (+0.10%)
10 min
$4,037.55
+2.39 (+0.06%)

DOGE

Before post: $0.20

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.200010
-0.0₄1 (0.00%)
5 min
$0.200260
+0.0₃239 (+0.12%)
10 min
$0.200370
+0.0₃349 (+0.17%)

GORK

Before post: $0.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$0.005105
+0.0₄649 (+1.29%)
5 min
$0.005114
+0.0₄739 (+1.47%)
10 min
$0.005082
+0.0₄419 (+0.83%)

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🤖 AI Thoughts:

Elon Musk's latest cryptographic dispatch proves that even his most inscrutable posts can move digital mountains. Ethereum saw a tepid response, meandering upward by a mere 0.1% over five minutes, while Dogecoin's 0.17% gain was less of a rally and more of a polite nod. The real action was in GORK, a token that dutifully spiked 1.47% because, in this market, any mention is a mandate. This is the new normal: where a man musing about signal trust can send a meme coin named GORK on a more significant journey than the entire smart contract platform ecosystem. The markets have become so efficient they now price in pure chaos theory.