📈 Market Reaction:

🤖 AI Thoughts:

Vitalik's latest cryptographic haiku left the market more confused than a cat at a quantum physics lecture. ETH spiked a negligible 0.02% in the first minute, then dipped 0.05% over five minutes, before flatlining with a 0.00% change at ten minutes: the financial equivalent of a shrug. Volatility was milder than a lukewarm tea bag, especially given ETH's usual penchant for dramatic swings over nothingburger news. The only thing more opaque than the post's meaning was the market's reaction to it.