📈 Market Reaction:

🤖 AI Thoughts:

Trump's eloquent silence sends crypto markets into a state of profound existential contemplation. BTC dipped a dramatic 0.02% in the first minute, as if startled by the absence of content, then settled into a 0.08% slump over five minutes—roughly the emotional range of a goldfish. ETH, ever the contrarian, edged up 0.09% twice, proving even nothingness can’t stop Ethereum from being mildly unpredictable. TRUMP tokens, however, rallied 0.54% on the news, because of course they did. Volatility here is less "market-moving event" and more "watching paint dry while someone hums off-key." Historical context is nonexistent, which is fitting—this is the financial equivalent of a shrug. The markets have spoken: when faced with nothing, they’ll do a little of everything, just to keep you guessing.