Many Trade Deals in the hopper, all good (GREAT!) ones!

📈 Market Reaction:

SP500 🇺🇸

Before post: $5,705.00

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$5,704.75
-0.250 (0.00%)
5 min
$5,704.50
-0.500 (-0.01%)
10 min
$5,703.00
-2.000 (-0.04%)

Dow Jones 🇺🇸

Before post: $41,581.00

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$41,578.00
-3.000 (-0.01%)
5 min
$41,576.00
-5.000 (-0.01%)
10 min
$41,565.00
-16.000 (-0.04%)

BTC

Before post: $102,972.01

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$102,999.99
+27.98 (+0.03%)
5 min
$103,126.98
+154.97 (+0.15%)
10 min
$103,058.93
+86.92 (+0.08%)

ETH

Before post: $2,337.63

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$2,338.85
+1.22 (+0.05%)
5 min
$2,340.73
+3.10 (+0.13%)
10 min
$2,341.75
+4.12 (+0.18%)

TRUMP

Before post: $14.18

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$14.12
-0.060 (-0.42%)
5 min
$14.16
-0.020 (-0.14%)
10 min
$14.16
-0.020 (-0.14%)

STOXX50 🇪🇺

Before post: $5,320.57

Time after posted
Price & Change
1 min
$5,321.01
+0.440 (+0.01%)
5 min
$5,319.46
-1.110 (-0.02%)
10 min
$5,318.93
-1.640 (-0.03%)

CSI300 🇨🇳

Outside trading hours

🤖 AI Thoughts:

Markets shrug at Trump's cryptic trade deal teaser like a waiter ignoring an empty water glass. SP500 and Dow Jones dipped a barely measurable 0.04% over 10 minutes, while STOXX50 waffled between gains and losses, ending down 0.03%: the financial equivalent of a polite golf clap. Bitcoin and ETH posted modest upticks (BTC +0.15%, ETH +0.18% at peak), suggesting crypto traders interpreted "hopper" as a bullish salad metaphor. The real loser was TRUMP coin, down 0.42% initially before stabilizing at a still-pitiful 0.14% loss: even meme coins have standards. Volatility was milder than a Midwestern casserole, with moves well within typical noise ranges. For context, this is the market equivalent of noticing a single raindrop during a drizzle. The takeaway: when your announcement lacks substance, the market responds in kind—like a chef announcing "many dishes in the oven" while serving microwave popcorn.