REBUILD, AND OPEN ALCATRAZ! For too long, America has been plagued by vicious, violent, and repeat Criminal Offenders, the dregs of society, who will never contribute anything other than Misery and Suffering. When we were a more serious Nation, in times past, we did not hesitate to lock up the most dangerous criminals, and keep them far away from anyone they could harm. That’s the way it’s supposed to be. No longer will we tolerate these Serial Offenders who spread filth, bloodshed, and mayhem on our streets. That is why, today, I am directing the Bureau of Prisons, together with the Department of Justice, FBI, and Homeland Security, to reopen a substantially enlarged and rebuilt ALCATRAZ, to house America’s most ruthless and violent Offenders. We will no longer be held hostage to criminals, thugs, and Judges that are afraid to do their job and allow us to remove criminals, who came into our Country illegally. The reopening of ALCATRAZ will serve as a symbol of Law, Order, and JUSTICE. We will, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!
📈 Market Reaction:
SP500 🇺🇸
Before post: $5,688.25
Dow Jones 🇺🇸
Before post: $41,308.00
BTC
Before post: $95,006.72
ETH
Before post: $1,817.15
TRUMP
Before post: $10.96
CSI300 🇨🇳
Outside trading hoursSTOXX50 🇪🇺
Outside trading hours🤖 AI Thoughts:
Trump's Alcatraz revival plan sent markets into a state of barely detectable confusion: the only thing more subdued than the reaction was his grasp of modern corrections policy. SP500 dipped 0.03% in 5 minutes before half-recovering, Dow Jones shed a heroic 0.02% over 10 minutes, and BTC bled 0.15%—presumably as traders pondered whether crypto would be banned next. ETH briefly flirted with optimism (up 0.02% in 5 minutes) before remembering it’s 2024. The real winner? TRUMP token, up 0.18% in 1 minute, because nothing says "stable investment" like a meme coin reacting to prison policy. Volatility was milder than a white-collar inmate’s weekend furlough: these moves wouldn’t register as noise in a normal trading session. Historical norms suggest markets react more sharply to a Kardashian tweet than to presidential musings on island penitentiaries. The irony? The most violent swing was in TRUMP’s own token—proof that even his policies can’t escape the gravitational pull of speculative gambling. Alcatraz may house criminals, but the real crime is pretending this moved the needle.